What to Say When you Don’t Know What to Say
Where to begin? My little brother got married on Saturday. Married. The same kid we sent down the ice track we built in the ravine (which apparently only exist in Cleveland) to make sure no one else would get hurt and who said things like “Gabuter” (computer) when he was 3 is wearing a wedding band. I’d say “surreal” except that I’ve got a Hungarian sleeping on my couch waiting for Fedex to come everyday to deliver his passport so he can drive back to Yellowknife Canada. I’ve also got yoga class 4 days a week, I own a car and have absolutely no money to pay for it and I’m on a PhD track. Oh, and my other brother’s going to have a baby in February. What the heck is going on here.
Life can be full of interesting moments. For the past 3 months I’ve been sweating blood, so consumed in my own struggles. As it turns out, life continued on around me. For some (my brothers), I re-surfaced just in time. Weddings and babies, though moments that might not be part of my own journey, are not moments to miss. Andras appearing out of nowhere just when I was wondering when and if I’d ever see him again is a fortuitous happenstance…but not one that’s not been enjoyable. The universe, I think, must’ve interceded…I feel like a different person for having witnessed all of it.
Tomorrow will bring a new day with different, better insights. But what I know is this: for the past 3 weeks I have better thoughts about my life, my career, and myself than I have for a long time…and it’s because I was busy thinking about other people.
Giving always means receiving if only in the craziest of ways. I’m glad I was awake enough to catch all of it. Here’s to more of that!