It’s funny, when I started this blog lo, many years ago, I used to get comments from people thinking this was a camping blog and all of the auto ads would be for REI and other outdoorsy “outfitters.” Hilarious because I absolutely do. not. camp. Not. ever. I did once and was immediately revolted and repelled by the realization that all of the condensation in the tent half way through the night was our collective spit droplets reconstituted and now dripping on my face.
Ugh. No thank you.
Instead, it’s a nod to wandering…something that I never considered was such an essential part of me until my early days of grad school when, upon my move to yet another new apartment (I think I was averaging a new apartment about every year for quite a while) someone commented, “you should just set up a tent on the beach.” And so I did…just not the kind that will collect and return my own spit back to me at my most vulnerable moments unaware.
I’ve tried to close the tent many times over the years. Sometimes it has sat completely lifeless for months, years, at a time. I’ve tried rebranding, re-designing, moving it to and fro…it just stays with me. I take this as a sign that, in fact, I’m most comfortable knowing I can wander and that, ultimately, I will.
Of course, like any complex human, I have an interesting counterpoint to this wanderer who embraces and holds close this tent: I’m incredibly grounded. I generally like routine, I’ve worn the same clothes for probably ten years, I carry my stuff with me, I’m not quick to let go. At the same time, though, the fact that I can move when ready helps me stay in the moment and remember that nothing is forever. There’s always a different pasture, a new road, a new mountain. We can only hope that they’re greener.
So, this Tent will probably always be open for business. The form may change but the essence will remain…and I’ll wander on. And love it.
You can always come with me.